War Stories, Humor, And Inspirational Thoughts Forum
After reading the post at:
http://www.thecreativeinvestor.com/modules.php?mop=modload&name=Forum&file=viewtopic&topic=15735&forum=24
and reflecting upon some of my favorite posts that have come through TCI, I think it would be fun to have a forum for the lighter side of real estate.
Could be fun.
Ain't that the truth!
OK Guys and Nancy, you asked for it.
It is late 1941. I got shot down over France which was occupied by the Germans. I was in the RAF as a Fighter Pilot and obviously not too successfull.
In any case I end up in this POW camp with a bunch of Brits who got caught at Dunkirk. I ask to join the escape group and they say no cause I am not British just a colonial, an American, I should wait six months and ask again.
A few days latter I am sweeping up the dump barracks I live in and I notice a German Officer striding across the camp. His heels are clicking in the dirt, his stride is firm and hard. Probably thinking Eine Swine Englanders. He strides up to the first wire gate, the guard on duty salutes opens the gate and out he goes.
Hell, I think that SOB never even looked up. I'll bet he is on automatic. Sooo I droped my broom, fold my hands behind my back and stride toward the gate. I say to myself. Ein Swinhunt Englanders full of BS and Tea. I approach the gate, right on, the guard opens it, comes to attention and salutes me. I mean he is on automatic. His head is full of fat broads and weinerwurst. I walk out. The outer gate is open I am gone, Free at Last....
I am in the forest and an elderly lady on a Bicycle is approaching, she has a funny hat on with a fake flower dangling down. Of course being a Californian I stop her and engage in conversation.
I then steal the Bicycle and her clothes, you should have seen the look on her face when I told her to take her clothes off. What a smile, you should have seen her face, when I put her clothes on. Even funnyer..I guess she had never met a Californian before. Ah well, emulating Gays is part of our culture.
Anyway after all kinds of things I am finaly in a safe house in Paris, they are making the proper cards and stuff and I am dressed like a typical french civilian, Beret, cigarrette dangling from my mouth a wine breath and a bleery look. I go for a bike ride around Paris with a member of the Resistance. We pass this 9 unit with a court yard on Ave Hoche just off the Champs, there is a SS guard at the entrance and it is obviously taken over by the Germans. The guy riding with me tells me he owns it and it is lost forever. Soo what else, I buy it for $15,000 USA dollars. I give him a draft on my bank in New York. We go to an attorney, he draws a deed and down we go on our bikes all three of us and record the deed.
At recordation the recorder sits at her desk and behind her are two german thugs in the hats and trenchcoats. Oh my god if they only knew that right in front of them is an escaping pilot from the RAF.
And that dear friends is how I bought my first apartment house.
The minute Paris fell, we had to wait two days for the French army to catch up so they could lead the parade. I am now an officer in the USAAC. I dash in cause now I am in the OSS, seems I crashed too many airplanes. I roar up the Champs turn right on Rue Hoch and pull up in front of my 9 unit. The SS are burning documents in the courtyard and running around like crazys. I hollar Attention!! and I tell them to hurry because the Americans are here and we want to move in. So we laugh and kid and exchange cigarettes and dirty pictures and they go away. I have a big sign made to put on the front of the property. In English. OFF LIMITS all personal Headquarters AI 9 USAAC.
See a Creative Investor hard at work, we never stop even while growing up. So next time you go for a bike ride. Look Around, you might see a good 9 unit.
Einer Grossen Dumpkopf Lucius
Humor, war and real estate all in one story. If only the erstwhile owner of the 9 unit had been LeClerc or Gene Kelly...
Lufous,
How old are you? I would have to venture a guess at about 83. 20 in 1941, 63 years from then is today.
You are 83 right? Or are your stories all for fun?
I'm liking this idea already!
How dare you, 83 indeed. I am but a child. glowing and fresh in the bloom of life. Yeah Right. I am 81. Remember we had delinquents in my day too. I was born in 1922 at the intersection of Wilshire Blvd and Santa Monica Blvd. My mother won a Shimmy Contest and stayed to drink the prize a Magnum of Champaigne. They put her in the car, cranked it up and aimed it downhill. At that fatefull intersection she got out and laid in the gutter. After the happy event she proceeded on to the hospital. As she so beautifully puts it. "Lucius was born in the gutter and has spent his life attempting to return."
Being a creature of habit and as Nancy would put it of limited ability, I stayed in the Air Force until 1954. Attached to the French Army I wrote the definitive study which said in essence do not come to Viet Nam it is a peoples war and no intruding nation has won such a war. I went back to Wash DC named (in honor of Telsa) and got promoted. Pin'd on the star and I resigned. I figured like the rest of you I had worked for the insane and inane long enough. I returned to Los Angeles and became a Janitor. and then on to glory in the field of Real Estate. I always said that the reason I was such a good janitor, it was the prior training. Perfect for fixing toilets. Yes from Briggy Gen to Janitor, how many people have had a career such as that. I always considered the job as a promotion from my prior position.
Thats the story simple but true. Eclectic and interesting, but in the final analyse just a delinquent kid from Beverly Hills not Toronto.
Scramble the forclosed, they have nothing to lose but their houses.
Lucius (a child at heart)
I think a closed thread that only lucious could post in would be hilarious.
I would read it daily.
i second that!!!!
Long live Lucious, I love this guy!!
Lucious...you're a Hollywood screenwriter, and nothing less!! And if you aren't, I happen to know several agents out that way. My second cousin (twice removed) is John Grisham. I've read all of his books, but have never been as riveted as when I read the above passage. Dude you are awesome!!!(that's S. Cal slang)
Lucious,
You are one hell of a character!Whenever I read your posts, I never know where I am going to end up, its usually with a big smile on my face. You are one cool cat!
All the best!
Great story and would not make a bad movie either.