Delicate Situation But Potential Not Good
I live in a duplex and rent the other unit out to a single mom and a teen. (she is 15 my daughter 14) my daughter and her teen are the same age and *used* to hang out. the tenant is very good and she pays on time time and never give me problems. In fact because of that I have yet to raise the rent even though some of my costs have.
Here is my problem, my daughter doesnt hang out with the teen because :
1) she has sex with a lot of guys (started at 12 I discovered)
2) her mom is away and she lets her bf in the house (both underaged) and she is having sex. I myself caught them fodling thru the curtains when i just walked out of the house to go to may car.
she showed some weed to my daughter and told her that she doesnt want to get a job in the summer at her mom's insistance but raher wants to grow some weed and sell it and make money that way ( not sure if it's real or not I have seen any in the back yard she was saying she grow it indoors)
in short she has all kinds of boys around. some are mostly low lifes, her mom is NEVER home a lot of the nights (she has a bf and she stays there).
My daughter shared a lot all the guys she been sleeping with. NOw it's not my place to tell her how to raise her kid, my daughter doesnt like her much and has other firends however some of these gusy who come around are low lifes. I believe i need to tell her mom what I personally seen but if i mention the other stuff that my daughter shared i figured her daughter has her so hoodwinks and plays that duitful daughter whenever her mom is home, she would never beleive me. The daughter is very slick.
the way i look at it , there might be a potential liablility with underage kids in the house, especialy guys. My daughter is begging me not to tell her mom of the weed as the daughter will know it's my daughter who told. I just am getting nervous as I live next door and this girl is out of control IMO. The mother always pays on time and as a tenant i couldnt ask for a better person. What can i do? what should I do?????
i do live next door! Should I just raise rents and hope she moves out. in a way i want that becasue some of these guys and who she hangs out with do not look like upstanding citizens if you know what i mean!
Raise the rent. You won't win the argument. You are putting a daughter between her mother and you wont win. Think of a creative way to remove them from the house. I am a father of twins and I wouldn't want my kids around that and won't!
that's what i was thinking too. I will mention seeing the boy in the house with no one there . i am sure the mother doesnt condone that and i mention that he is under age and that is a liability. I believe just as a mother I have some right to voice my distaste but not tell her how to raise her kid. delicate situation yes. my daughter gets A's and Bs, plays volleyball and invovled with job's daughters. the other kid is failing with d's and fs, wants to grow grass and has hand mulitple sex partners starting at 13!.
I haven't done it yet but am thinking about putting a clause in the lease regarding unsupervised kids. They're tearing up the place!
i think that is a good idea and something about not permitting underage kids alone in the premises who are not in the lease when no one is home.
Hey,
This is one of the BIG problems of renting a duplex, where you live on one side. You (anyone) will have an extremely hard time seperating business and your day-to-day life.
I understand the issues you are talking about, but I am sorry to say you do NOT have any control over them.
Look at them a different was, if you were living in a house and the next door neighbor's kid was like this, what would you do? Every one of us has faced this at one time or another.
From a legal point, raising the rent (unless it it way below market right now) is a very, very, very bad idea. You want to raise the rent on a single mom in order to kick her out of her home. She has done NOTHING to violet the lease, nor has her daughter. You will lose a big lawsuit.
the rent is below market and I have never raised it in three years so raising it is perfectly legal. . if you live in CA many people have little option excep buying a duplex or multi to live in and ernt out. I too am a single mother so i dont have a lot of sympathy for my tenannt any more than myself.
Bruce, the difference in your scenario is she owns the "neighbor's house".
I would document teh dates, times, issues you personnally see things occur and approach the Mom. I would not mention anything you have heard second hand.
BTW: Is she on a lease? Do you have anything in the lease that pertains to this?
[addsig]
Well given the status of the lease all you have to do is give her 30 days notice of termination and she's going to have to leave (though maybe not in 30 days. You may have to evict her.) In the mean time I'd press criminal charges against the phone caller for assault, call a social service agency on leaving the daughter home alone and the drug use, generally make it easier for the low-life boyfriend to hang out someplace else.
i appreciate everyone help in this matter. my daughter told me too late on the call as the number is now gone but i will definately let her mother know.
Find a cop friend to hang out at your www.house.Than let him scare them.
Mdetective friend rides with me to colect rent from the bad tenants.
I agree with raising the rent. Even if they don't move out it will help you with the rising cost of your own bills.
You may also want to have a heart to heart with the other mom. maybe let her know what is going on when she is gone. Not extremely detailed, but maybe she is unaware that boys are staying the night. Explain it to her from your standpoint and voice your concerns to her.
Either way if you are bothered then you need to do something to put your mind at ease. Good luck.
Maybe its just the way I see it but in mho
Just send her a letter stating that after such and such a date you will terminate her month to month rental agreement. I would by no means bring up the reason why your doing it. End of story why make life even harder by telling the mother about what is going on while she is not there. Just keep it simple. Besides by saying things to her mother could make her or her daughter cause more of a problem in their final 30 days.
I know you're getting a lot of REI-centric advice. That's fine.
You could also put yourself in your tenant's place. As a parent of a daughter, would you want to know what was going on?
exactly. I think she would want to know what is going on. HOwever the previous advice is good, that is, make it only first hand information. I am dreading this meeting but i know i need to do it. thanks for all your imput!
she may not believe you. she will have to believe the pictures. don't sign them or write anything. if she's concerned she will come to you........kenmax
My .02 is... Don't get involved in your tenants personal life. Give her a warning that you're considering terminating her lease due to undesirables being on the premises, then if it's not stopped, terminate her lease with a 30 day notice. It's not your job to raise her teenager, nor are you responsible for her actions, except where it affects your investment. Taking pictures and what not are just opening yourself up to a lawsuit of some sort.
I agree with Jam200, no good deed goes unpunished, your first concern should be to protect yourself and not to damage your case in the chance of litigation
At a REI club meeting we were advised to report to the police any suspected drug activty in our rental properties. This will or can protector you against seizure of your property if there is a drug raid!!!!
wow! great idea!
Quote:
On 2004-08-18 14:20, kenmax wrote:
take pictures of the guys going into the house. mail the pictures to the mother. you don't even have to write anything. she will get the idea..........km
<font size=-1>[ Edited by kenmax on Date 08/18/2004 ]</font>
Hey,
OMG!!! This is insane.
You guys seem to think this is a giant game of who can be the most creative. Come up with an "out of the box" idea and win a prize!! Well it is not a game; it is real life.
Has anyone thought of what a STUPID idea taking pictures of her daughter and people coming to her house is!! Imagine YOU get a bunch of unsigned pictures in an unmarked envelope...are you going to say "Gosh, who is my daughter inviting in to my house" or are you going to say "OH MY GOD!!! There is some insane person following my daughter!!!" and call the cops.
Now imagine, they find out the pictures came from the landlord. Can you say HARRASSMENT...can you say "denied them the peaceful enjoyment of their house"...maybe you should look in to the STALKER laws in your community.
Unless they are breaking the law, the ONLY thing you can do is raise the rent.
This neighbor girl is a terrible influence on your daughter. News Flash....more than likely it's only going to get worse.
I would be worried about your daugher more than anything, and it sound like you are. There are other good tenants out there. Sounds like you can afford to be picky and offer them lower rents.
You mentioned above "I myself observed her bf (who is just shy of 18) making out heavily with her daughter ".....You could wait until he's 18 and see if you can get some statuatory charge filed against the guy. May not make you the most popular person in the world, but it may send a reality check to this girls mother.
If I were the woman next door, I'd want to know what my daugher was involved in. You may say to her "I've seen some strange things going on while you're not home. Let me know if you ever want me to let you know what things I'm seeing." Rather than you blaming her daugher and drawing conclusions you can tell her the things that you've observed personally and let her draw her own conclusions.
THAT SAID, I think you're fighting an uphill battle.
I live in CA also and have managed my apartment rentals myself for years. Believe me, you have all the power you need to take care of this situation. If you are sure you want this woman and her daughter out, give them their 60 day notice or 30 day notice if they've been there less than a year. If you KNOW the girl is smoking or growing pot in the house you can give them a non-curable 3 Day Notice to Quit. If you do this, give them a 60 or 30 Day notice at the same time also. If you are unsure if you want a good tenant and her nightmare offspring gone, jack the rent up $150/ month and let chance take over. If she stays, you'll have more money to help you overlook her daughter, if she leaves, your problem is gone. Really consider whether or not it is worth getting rid of her, as it costs $$ to get another tenant in there, and you never know for sure what you're getting. Whatever you decide, I hope it works out.
This is YOUR business and YOUR personal life. Let her take care of her business and her personal life. On the business side, you have undesirables/drug activity on your property. Probably the best thing to do is just get rid of it. More importantly in your personal life, you have undesireables/drug activity around YOU and more importantly YOUR daughter. Get them the $%&# away from your daughter.
Whatever help or advice you try to give will fly back in your face. You might be helping, but as the messanger you will pay for it. I see no reward for you and planty of reprecussions.
On the bright side you have a daughter who trusts you enough to come to you with her concerns. Be very happy for that, and reward her by curing the situation and making her life easier. If you get involved, your daughter will most likely feel a backlash. Hurting your daughter (who was good) to help someone else's daughter (who was bad) does not make very much sense to me.
You seem to have a very good relationship with your daughter. That is far more important to you than the rent, or if the neighbor's daughter grows up to be the President or a stripper. Preserve the most important thing in your life, and reduce the risks.
No tenant is better than a bad tenant.
I used to live in Chula Vista and had a very similar situation happen to me. Here's what I did, and it worked.
First of all, our daughters are much more important to us than dollars. They can not be replaced and sometimes they can not be repaired. Forget the dollars and get those tenants out, now, if not sooner.
My friend was a DEA agent. I met him at National University during classes. I told him about the situation across the street from me. Undesireables were going into the house at all times of the day and night when the parents weren't home. He asked me to get license plate numbers, which I did. He ran them through some computer somewhere and discovered that this was a real live wire. They set up surveillance for a few days, got the goods on the neighbors and their guests, and pronto! all were gone.
Follow this example. Call the cops now! If you don't you are in danger of losing your most precious thing. Secondly, with today's drug laws, you could also lose your property. They could somehow say that you knew about it and allowed it to continue even though you knew it was wrong. CYA!! Call the cops. Let them do the dirty work. You don't have to take that on yourself, the cops won't tell them who called.
Good luck,
Bob